I have been so relaxed, so ready, so entirely ON BOARD with this surgery. The last two days have been good, my friends. And then, today, this morning, the entire east coast suddenly on alert for stormpocolypse — well, to say that I have been tossed right back into worry mode? Yes, now there is this.
But…my friends are amazing. The calls have already gone out. My closest friend is on standby with her all-wheel drive Subaru, and more importantly, another friend’s husband has volunteered to show up with his snowplow at 4 am Tuesday morning to drive me to the hospital if necessary. These calls, these contingency plans are being orchestrated around me, by my friends, my community, all while I sit and fret and worry about two feet of snow and whether the roads will be plowed.
I called Dr. P this morning to ask what happens during a big storm, and she told me they get there. The doctors, nurses, hospital staff, they all get there. No matter what. She even kind of jokingly said, “If I have to come pick you up myself, I will.”
Winter weather is a tricky thing. Most of the time, the forecasters get it wrong. I’ve learned not to pay attention, not to listen to the reports until the weather is actually upon us. Too many times we’ve braced for storms that aren’t. But how can I not think about the weather for Tuesday? It’s impossible not to.
And so now, it is all I’m thinking about. Maybe it’s better than thinking about the cancer? Truthfully, it was much better yesterday when I was thinking about none of it.
Here’s the thing: I am grateful beyond words, beyond measure, for the goodness of those around me, for the community that supports me. For this incredible village and random acts of kindness, and generous men with snowplows and can-do attitudes and friends who are sisters.
I am stronger than this cancer. And I am stronger because of this, because of them, because of all of you.